LAPTOP SHOPPING NETWORK DOCS

Everything the host says between the sparkles Written down once, so you do not have to call

01 · OVERVIEWWhat is Laptop Shopping Network

A 24 hour shopping channel with one item in the catalogue. The item is the laptop. The host has been presenting it since the tape started and has not blinked.

Everything looks like a VHS recording from 1996 because it is one. Tracking bars, tape wobble and channel static are part of the broadcast, not bugs.

HOST: One man in a blue suit, big grin, both hands always pointing at the laptop

ITEM: Item 0001, a beige laptop, one previous owner, still boots

THE FORMAT: Infomercial. Call now, operators are standing by, only 999 left

CHAIN: Robinhood Chain, token through the Pons launchpad

02 · THE ITEMWhat you get

The full pitch, as read on air. The counter in the corner is real in the sense that it goes down.

item 0001 ├── ONE LAPTOP one owner, lightly used, heavily discussed ├── STILL BOOTS nobody knows why, nobody has asked ├── CONTENTS not included, already leaked ├── THE STORY you have heard it, it comes with the box ├── ONLY 999 LEFT the counter restocks when it runs out └── BUT WAIT there is no more

03 · ON AIRThe channels

The broadcast cycles through five channels on its own. You can switch with the remote in the corner or with the keyboard.

channels ├── CH 1 the host, live, ten seconds on a loop ├── CH 2 the item on the pedestal, slow zoom ├── CH 3 the host holds it up, the sparkle happens ├── CH 4 Linda from Ohio, before and after └── CH 5 the order form, the contract, the number to call

04 · CONTROLSUsing the site

REMOTE: The - and + buttons in the corner change the channel. ← → and 1 to 5 on the keyboard do the same

CALL NOW: The red button is the buy button. It opens the Pons launchpad, and the token page once the contract is in

SOUND: Quiet until you tap. Your first click anywhere starts the studio music

BELOW THE TV: What you get, satisfied customers, and the order form again with the contract and the buttons

THE COUNTER: Goes down on its own. When it reaches the last few, the warehouse restocks to 999

05 · TOKENToken

The token launches on Robinhood Chain through the Pons launchpad. The contract goes onto the order form on channel five, at the bottom of the page and here. Until then all three say soon and the copy button says not yet.

CONTRACTsoon

Call now on Pons

CHAIN: Robinhood Chain, EVM, addresses start with 0x

LAUNCHPAD: Pons, ponsfamily.com. Call now opens the launchpad, and the token page once the address is in

CHART: DexScreener on Robinhood Chain once the token is live

06 · PRIVACYNothing is stored

No backend, no account, no cookies, nothing written to your browser. The phone lines are a drawing.

MUSIC: One CC0 loop from OpenGameArt, plays after your first tap

REDUCED MOTION: If your system asks for it, the wobble, the tracking bar and the starburst stop, the channels still switch

07 · FAQQuestions

Is it the laptopIt is a laptop. One owner, lightly investigated. The host will not say more on air

Why is there only one itemThe catalogue was longer, the rest sold in 1996

Does the number workThe number is the red button. It goes to Pons

Why does the counter go back upWarehouse policy. Nobody has seen the warehouse

What happens at launchThe contract goes onto the order form, the red button starts pointing at the token page, the host keeps going